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Extra Nutty! Even More Letters from a Nut!

Author : Ted Nancy
Publisher : Macmillan
Page : 244 pages
File Size : 46,67 MB
Release : 2000-06-14
Category : Humor
ISBN : 9780312261559

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Welcome to the world of Ted L. Nancy. Some have called him inspired, some have called him a goofball, and many have wondered who Ted really is. All we know is that Ted loves to write and it shows-Extra Nutty! is chock full of nut, a record of real live correspondence from America's favorite pen pal to a cross-section of this great nation. Extra Nutty! is bursting with all new letters showing Ted at his looniest. Take, for example, this: Dear Business Permits Dept.: I want to apply for a business permit in your fine city...I operate the Soup & Sleep Restaurants. You can either order soup or sleep. A hostess will greet you and you would say, "I'd like to sleep." She will lead you to a table where you can catch a few winks. Or this: Dear Helena Ocean & Dog Licensing Dept: I will stage the play "Mark Twain with Tourette's Syndrome.". . . Let me know what arrangements I need to make to store my anchovie tank at your seaport. Thank you. I await large crowds. Or even this: Dear Kmart: I have invented a male underpants liner...This liner fits right in your shorts and can be thrown away after 15 weeks. I have been wearing the same pair of underwear for 105 days now and although they feel a little stretchy they are perfectly clean. Ted's unique way of looking at the world-and how the world responds to Ted's schemes--is captured here in this extra nutty, hugely hilarious collection.

More Letters from a Nut

Author : Ted L. Nancy
Publisher : Bantam
Page : 871 pages
File Size : 15,39 MB
Release : 2013-07-31
Category : Humor
ISBN : 0804149801

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Seinfeld. For more than 33 million viewers, the Emmy Award-winning television show has become a Thursday night ritual. Now, even though the show has ended, Jerry Seinfeld's distinct brand of humor can still be yours. Ted L. Nancy's first book, Letters from a Nut, with an introduction by Jerry Seinfeld, now has more than 225,000 copies in print. In More Letters From a Nut, master-prankster Nancy shares even more sidesplittingly funny letters he has written and the unbelievable true responses he has received.

Letters from a Nut

Author : Ted L. Nancy
Publisher : HarperCollins
Page : 280 pages
File Size : 19,66 MB
Release : 2020-10-13
Category : Humor
ISBN : 0063084821

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Who is Ted L. Nancy? He's a superstitious Vegas high-roller who wants to gamble at a casino in his lucky shrimp outfit... He's the genius inventor of "Six Day Underwear"... He's a stage actor who only travels while dressed as a stick of butter... He is, in reality, a twisted prankster—a supremely off-kilter alter ego who sends patently ridiculous letters to corporate honchos, entertainment conglomerates, national publications, politicians, celebrities and heads of state. His innocent requests, queries, complaints, demands, and suggestions are so absurd it is amazing they fool anyone—but often the deadpan responses he receives are even more hilarious: "Dear Mr. Nancy, It is not often that we receive such enthusiastic support for the paper bag." —The Paper Bag Council "On behalf of Greyhound, there should be no problem traveling while in your butter costume." —Greyhound Bus Lines "I look forward to working with you to create a better future for this great nation." —Vice President Al Gore Letters From A Nut is an insanely inspired, truly madcap collection of Nancy correspondence, a wet-yourself-in-a-public place funny aggregation of official—and officially certifiable—requests, complaints, fan mail and questions that could not possibly have been taken seriously...but, amazingly, were.

All New Letters from a Nut

Author : Ted L. Nancy
Publisher : Crown Archetype
Page : 258 pages
File Size : 16,45 MB
Release : 2010
Category : Humor
ISBN : 0307716287

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The best-selling author of Letters from a Nut presents a latest collection of whimsical correspondence between the author and the unwary establishments, organizations and government offices that attempted to respond to such requests as a hotel room for 300 hamsters and a 59-foot piece of bologna.

Hello Junk Mail!

Author : Ted L. Nancy
Publisher :
Page : 0 pages
File Size : 24,65 MB
Release : 2008
Category : American wit and humor
ISBN : 9780980059212

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Humour.

Whole-Grain Mornings

Author : Megan Gordon
Publisher : Ten Speed Press
Page : 186 pages
File Size : 46,92 MB
Release : 2013-12-31
Category : Cooking
ISBN : 1607745011

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A seasonal collection of enticing, comforting recipes for sweet and savory whole-grain breakfasts including granola, warm porridges, muffins, savory tarts and eggs—as well as seasonal toppings and accompaniments like homemade yogurt and almond milk, all from the writer of the popular blog A Sweet Spoonful. A beautiful guide to morning meals, Whole-Grain Mornings offers sixty-five sweet and savory recipes for wholesome whole-grain breakfasts. Whether you’re cooking for busy weekdays, slow Sundays, or celebratory brunches, this charming cookbook will inspire you to look beyond the average bowl of cereal toward healthy and delicious ways to incorporate whole grains like amaranth, farro, and barley into your morning meals. Seasonally organized recipes feature favorite one-bowl breakfast fare like Apricot Pistachio Granola and Triple-Coconut Quinoa Porridge alongside more unconventional options like Saucy Tomato Poached Eggs with Kale and Wheat Berries and Nutty Millet Breakfast Cookies. With information on timesaving alternatives as well as a guide to the most commonly used whole grains—and sprinkled with abundant food and lifestyle photography throughout—this cookbook guarantees the most important meal of the day will also become your favorite.

Oakley the Squirrel: The Search for Z

Author : Nancy Rose
Publisher : Workman Publishing Company
Page : 31 pages
File Size : 31,40 MB
Release : 2021-06-22
Category : Juvenile Fiction
ISBN : 1523510412

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The letter Z is missing! Help little Oakley find it in this charming picture book with photos of real squirrels! Oakley the Squirrel: The Search for Z is an alphabet book like no other. In it, we meet Little Oakley as he embarks on a quest to find the letter Z. He searches through an alphabet of human objects—looks beneath the Bed, claws through the Closet, digs through Drawers, examines his Easel, and so on. By the time he gets to a basket of yarn, Oakley starts to yawn, and soon falls asleep. And Z—as in, Zzzzzz!—appears!

Why I Am a Catholic

Author : Garry Wills
Publisher : Houghton Mifflin Harcourt
Page : 420 pages
File Size : 34,70 MB
Release : 2003
Category : Biography & Autobiography
ISBN : 9780618380480

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In this provocative work, which could not be timelier, Garry Wills, one of our country's most noted writers and historians, offers a powerful statement of his Catholic faith. Beginning with a reflection on his early experience of that faith as a child and later as a Jesuit seminarian, Wills reveals the importance of Catholicism in his own life. He goes on to challenge, in clear and forceful terms, the claim that criticism or reform of the papacy is an assault on the faith itself. For Wills, a Catholic can be both loyal and critical, a loving child who stays with his father even if the parent is wrong. Wills turns outward from his personal experiences to present a sweeping narrative covering two thousand years of church history, revealing that the papacy, far from being an unchanging institution, has been transformed dramatically over the millennia -- and can be reimagined in the future. At a time when the church faces one of its most difficult crises, Garry Wills offers an important and compelling entrée into the discussion of the church's past -- and its future. Intellectually brisk and spiritually moving, Why I Am a Catholic poses urgent questions for Catholic and non-Catholic readers alike.

Ted L. Nancy's Afternoon Stories

Author : Ted L. Nancy
Publisher : Booksurge Publishing
Page : 0 pages
File Size : 30,12 MB
Release : 2011-03-15
Category : Letters
ISBN : 9781439247273

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Now Ted writes stories instead of letters and reads them to people at their jobs. If they don't want to hear the story, he brings on an idiotic act like the ventriloquist with a puppet in a coma.

Stargirl

Author : Jerry Spinelli
Publisher : Laurel Leaf
Page : 209 pages
File Size : 38,87 MB
Release : 2004-05-11
Category : Young Adult Fiction
ISBN : 0440416779

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ONE OF TIME MAGAZINE’S 100 BEST YA BOOKS OF ALL TIME • NEW YORK TIMES BESTSELLER A modern-day classic from Newbery Medalist Jerry Spinelli, this beloved celebration of individuality is now an original movie on Disney+! And don't miss the author's highly anticipated new novel, Dead Wednesday! Stargirl. From the day she arrives at quiet Mica High in a burst of color and sound, the hallways hum with the murmur of “Stargirl, Stargirl.” She captures Leo Borlock’ s heart with just one smile. She sparks a school-spirit revolution with just one cheer. The students of Mica High are enchanted. At first. Then they turn on her. Stargirl is suddenly shunned for everything that makes her different, and Leo, panicked and desperate with love, urges her to become the very thing that can destroy her: normal. In this celebration of nonconformity, Newbery Medalist Jerry Spinelli weaves a tense, emotional tale about the perils of popularity and the thrill and inspiration of first love. Don’t miss the sequel, Love, Stargirl, as well as The Warden’s Daughter, a novel about another girl who can't help but stand out. “Spinelli is a poet of the prepubescent. . . . No writer guides his young characters, and his readers, past these pitfalls and challenges and toward their futures with more compassion.” —The New York Times